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What ever happened to helping each other out?

February 25, 2016

What ever happened to helping each other out?

February 25, 2016

When I first started blogging I don’t think I could have possibly imagined what the blogging community would be like, if anything I would say I was quite naive. Don’t get me wrong, I have made some of the most amazing friends, met people that have changed my life and seen some of the most beautiful acts of kindness I have ever seen before. The majority of bloggers are wonderful and I couldn’t imagine my life without them.

However lately, I have been noticing that there are so many bloggers are not willing to help someone out when they reach out to them publically. 

A couple of weeks ago I posted on a couple of different Facebook groups that I was looking for some feedback on my Instagram account as I wanted to improve and gain more followers. I was expecting (out of 1000’s of members) that at least five or six people would comment with some honest, constructive criticism. They didn’t even need to visit my profile or follow me as I included a screenshot of my latest Instagram photos in the Facebook post.

In the morning I woke up to 32 notifications and I was in complete shock! How could that many people want to offer me advice? When I clicked on it however I could see that I was mistaken, nobody wanted to help me at all. Instead, I had 32 bloggers leaving the links to their Instagram accounts in the comments saying things like “I’d love it if you could follow me” or “you can find me here”.

Nobody had actually read my Facebook post properly. They literally couldn’t see past the words ‘Instagram’ and took it as an opportunity to gain another follower. 

I couldn’t believe that people had looked past the fact that I was asking for feedback and thought I had posted a ‘like for like’ post – another thing I can’t stand about some Facebook groups for bloggers. I really feel like bloggers are becoming more and more reluctant to help each other out lately.

What ever happened to just helping each other out and giving honest criticism?

Is it really all about the followers?

I want to point out that this does not apply to all groups and that there are a number of Facebook groups for bloggers where people are always willing to offer advice and help. My favourites are #TheGirlGang and UK Bloggers, and if you’re not already following these you should definitely check them out. nc

Have you ever experienced something like this? Do you think that bloggers are less reluctant to help others out than they used to be?
Lots of love,
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  • Erin February 25, 2016 at 10:22 am

    I definitely think the blogging market is completely oversaturated and everyone is out for themselves. It's both quite catty and too nicey-nice at the same time – bloggers find it hard to give other bloggers honest feedback.

    I don't know… it's a tough one. x

  • Areeba February 25, 2016 at 2:10 pm

    It has started to become a problem in this community. When I had started years ago, it wasn't that bad. I think it's selfish to shove your links everywhere when they're not needed. I love the #thegirlgang community so much!

  • Noor Unnahar February 25, 2016 at 3:13 pm

    Same thing has happened to me more than once, which basically sucks! I suppose it has to do something with increasing materialism in the blogging world. Of course it is amazing to do blogging as a job, but not everyone has the same motive. People could always use some real help.

    Noor | Noor's Place

  • Noor Unnahar February 25, 2016 at 3:15 pm

    BTW I love #thegirlgang so much. I found this post while scrolling the hashtag. So you can say it was a win. WINK.

  • Belen Carrion February 25, 2016 at 10:36 pm

    Oh my… I think I have been very lucky since all the bloggers I have found have been super friendly and nice and willing to help. I can't believe not one group member read your post! That's terrible… What group was it, by the way?

    Oh! And I've looked at your instagram and it's GORGEOUS. It's seriously goals. I don't think there's anything you need to improve…

    Be | lovefrombe

  • Kirsty C February 26, 2016 at 11:03 pm

    Yeah, I am finding it hard to come by honest feedback lately. If there's nothing in it for them some people are so reluctant to help! 🙁

    xx

  • Kirsty C February 26, 2016 at 11:04 pm

    I know, I would have happily followed people if I liked there feed and they had helped me out.

    Totally with you with #thegirlgang – it's awesome! xx

  • Kirsty C February 26, 2016 at 11:05 pm

    Finding my post through #thegirlgang is definitely a win, ha ha! Sorry to hear the same thing happened to you too 🙁 xx

  • Kirsty C February 26, 2016 at 11:05 pm

    I've never thought of asking people outside of the community, I might have to give that a go – thanks 🙂

    xx

  • Kirsty C February 26, 2016 at 11:06 pm

    I think it was called 'blog life' or 'blogging network' – I'm not sure there were a few offenders.

    Thank you so much for your comment about my Instagram – no one has ever said that before! 🙂

    xx

  • Nicky February 29, 2016 at 1:47 pm

    I can relate to this so much! I feel like there are so many bloggers out there that are totally obsessed with their own views, likes and followers and in turn forget to help other's out! If ever I see someone looking for genuine advice, I try and give it. Of course, I can understand why people want to put themselves out there – but if a few of those people had actually responded to you & left their link at the end, I'm sure you would have been 100% more likely to have a look!
    I've just had a look and followed your instagram, and honestly I love it! I'm such a sucker for themed accounts with bright images that all fit together!
    Nicky x
    teaandtakeaways.wordpress.com

  • aimee cottle March 3, 2016 at 10:12 am

    Yeah, I've definitely found that to be the case. I've asked a few times for help with one thing or another and either been completely ignored or seen my request used as a place to dump links. But I've also had great experiences with other bloggers who have helped me install a new template, create a blog button etc etc. It's sort of 50/50 I think. For every bad experience there's a good one. At least, in my experience so far! x http://www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk x

  • Amy Amynmore March 15, 2016 at 3:08 pm

    I think it's a natural thing with blogging being more competitive, but really, to not even read your post and see what you are actually asking is stupid! Did you respond to them? x
    Amy at Amy & More

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